Blank Space (2023)
If popular slang or culture is a way of understanding the ethos of our times then Rizz, Swiftie, de-influencing, beige flag, parasocial and situationship need to become part of our lexicon. These words give us a view into the lives of Millennials and Gen Z’ers (born 1996-2012) and a picture of 2023. Without question they seem to be a set of words that clusters around holding back from commitment versus a couple at the other end of the spectrum where they reflect a kind of signaling to identify as part of a team of followers or admirers. This dichotomy is in part a result of the isolation of the pandemic period. We know that many people, having learned to cope with the lack of in-person human connection during the worst of the virus, reported finding it difficult to resume a pre-pandemic level of social contact.
2023 was billed as the year where our lives would revert to normal mode: it was more or less the end of the pandemic; there was more stability in the workplace and the world. And, even though this past year turned out very differently politically, socially and economically, these words, honored by the Oxford University Press (OUP) at the end of the year, raised additional questions about the state of things. As SmarterWisdom looks back over the year, through some of these winning words, we had to ask ourselves: what do these words in fact say about the world we live in and how we live and work together across the generations?
Of the six words I want to draw to your attention, four of them, as we mentioned above, connect to ideas of neutrality, lack of definition or commitment, one-sidedness and discouragement. Let’s start there:
Situationship: a romantic or sexual relationship that is undefined and non-committal.
Parasocial: a one-sided relationship where one person is interested in another and yet the other is unaware of the interest.
Beige flag: a sign that you might want to stop and make a note of something someone reveals about themselves, and then usually move on. (Not a red flag.)
De-influencing: as opposed to influencing us on social media to buy things, those who engage in de-influencing encourage us not to do so.
These four words (phrases) rapidly became part of Millennials/Gen Z’ers vernacular during the past year; all of them actually contended for word of the year in a contest run annually by lexicographers from OUP. It’s interesting that the words highlighted here are all words about definition—or lack thereof—in relationships. Does it also speak of a lack of commitment, or an inability to commit in general? It certainly reads as not quite stepping into things but holding back. In addition, that these words are attempts to define or outline relationships during a time when many people connect to others solely on social media or dating sites, seems significant.
What does this mean for our frequently intergenerational workplaces? The words appear to describe a picture of people floating and unaligned, withholding and scared, reluctant and leaving stuff to others, or hoping to. How might we as leaders “hold” this concept that almost describes a kind of alienation, and make something of it? Step one, of course, is always awareness, something our blog is trying to do today—know that it is different for these generations. After awareness what action might you take? Well, certainly do not jump to conclusions. Be curious. Act on what you see and show not tell some ways in which your workmates might be able to connect more deeply or bring more passion to their work.
This is a hard image to take away from 2023! It is potentially a rather desperate picture. So let’s turn to the two words that duked it out for the winning spot with the OUP: Swiftie and Rizz. Do they give us hope? SmarterWisdom argues they do….First Swiftie, a word coined by ardent fans of music phenomenon Taylor Swift, herself a Millennial, born in 1989. Swifties are loyal and supportive fans. Through the ups and downs of the music world, popularity and criticism, Swifties are known to be there for each other and for their star. They are passionate, committed and dedicated followers and have become a model for other successful performers in terms of how the latter might cater to and reciprocate their fans’ love. As we have read and researched the phenomenon that is Taylor Swift for our own edification, we have learned that one reason Swift has such a loyal following is because her fans believe she sees them for who they are, and the words of her songs seem to speak to them directly. Swift’s lexicon, her code, is their lexicon and code—they feel heard and understood. Being heard and understood is something we all crave and certainly this feeling is a good one to promote in the workplace.
The winning word, and therefore the final part of this vocabulary picture is Rizz. Up against Swiftie for the final choice, Rizz, short for charisma, won in the OUP’s knockout. Charisma inspires devotion and so for it to be the OUP word of 2023, given the struggles with connection and commitment, does in fact make perfect sense, and should perhaps also inspire hope.
Our Words of Wisdom this month takes its name from Taylor Swift’s 2014 song “Blank Space.” It’s a rather satirical yet candid description of the kinds of relationships she became known for. SmarterWisdom hopes that you will reflect in some blank space of your own about the year gone by and the year coming up—and here’s wishing you a good 2024!